Gisèle Pelicot, the French woman whose now ex-husband is on trial for drugging and raping her, and inviting dozens of other men to rape her, has taken the stand in court for the first time.
Gisèle told the court in Avignon she wants women who have been raped to know that “it’s not for us to have shame – it’s for them”.
“I want all women who have been raped to say: Madame Pelicot did it, I can too. I don’t want them to be ashamed any longer,” she said, referring to her request for an open trial and for the videos of the alleged rapes to be shown.
Gisèle, 72, was taking the stand following a request from her legal team that she be given the chance to respond to the evidence and testimony that have been shared so far at the trial.
She said that over the last few weeks she had witnessed various wives, mothers and sisters of the defendants take the stand and say that the accused were “exceptional men”.
“That’s just like who I had back home,” she added. “But a rapist is not just someone you meet in a dark car park late at night. He can also be found in the family, among friends.”
She said she is “completely destroyed” and will have to build herself back up again. “I don’t know if my whole life will be enough to understand,” she added.
Addressing her former husband as Mr Pelicot, Gisèle said: “I wish I could still call him Dominique. We lived together for 50 years, I was a happy, fulfilled woman.”
“You were a caring, attentive husband, and I never doubted you. We shared laughter and tears,” she added, her voice breaking.
Some readers may find details in this story distressing.
Dominique has admitted to recruiting men online to rape his wife while she was under the effect of heavy sedatives and sleeping pills that he administered to her in secret for a decade.
Gisèle said that she used to feel lucky she had him by her side when she was suffering from health issues that were later revealed to be linked to the drugs he was giving her.
“I am trying to understand how this man, who to me was perfect, could have done this. How can he have betrayed me at this point? How could you let these strangers into my bedroom?” she said.
“I want to say to him: I’ve always tried to lift you higher, towards the light. You chose the darkest depths of human nature. You’re the one who made this choice.”
Gisèle said Dominique often used to cook meals for her and bring her ice cream after dinner – which is the method he later said he used to drug her: “I used to say to him: how lucky am I, you’re a darling, you really look after me.”
She added that she was never lightheaded or felt her heart race, and that she must have passed out quickly when she was drugged. She would wake up in her own bed the next morning and feel particularly tired but said she believed it was because of taking long walks.
“I had gynaecological issues, and some mornings I woke up with the same feeling as if my waters had broken. The signs were there, but I never knew how to decode them,” she added.
Gisèle and her lawyers also discussed whether Dominique might have been suffering from an inferiority complex due to an affair she had with a coworker, a perceived difference in social status between them or the fact that she had a loving childhood and he didn’t.
Returning to the resonance that the trial is having, she said: “I’ve been told I’m brave. This isn’t being brave, it’s having the will and determination to change society.”
“Bravery means jumping into the sea to rescue someone. I just have will and determination,” she said.
“This is why I come here every day… Even if I hear unspeakable things, I am holding on because of all the men and women who are right behind me.”
She said she has never regretted asking for the trial to be open: “I did it because what happened to me can never happen again.”
Most of the alleged rapes were filmed.
The majority of the defendants deny raping Gisèle, and argue that they cannot be guilty because they did not realise she was unconscious and therefore did not “know” they were raping her.
Although she has been present in court most days, Gisèle has only taken the stand twice.
The last time, on 18 September, she said she felt “humiliated” by suggestions she had agreed to take part in a sex game in which she pretended to be asleep when the men her husband recruited online came to their home.
“These men came to rape me. What I am hearing in this courtroom is so degrading, so humiliating,” she said.
The trial has attracted a huge amount of interest in France, where Gisèle has become a feminist icon – not least for waiving her right to anonymity and requesting an open trial. Her legal team said opening up the trial would shift the “shame” back on to the accused.
Last Saturday, marches in support of Gisèle were held in more than a dozen French cities. Several feminist organisations are also asking the French government to expand the law on rape to include a clause on consent.
The trial opened on 2 September. Despite lengthy daily hearings, it is only about halfway through due to the number of defendants that have to be questioned.
A verdict is expected in late December.
If you have been affected by this story the BBC Action Line web page features a list of organisations which are ready to provide support and advice.
