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Becky Miller did the math. The monthly mortgage payment of $1,095, plus utilities ate most of her $2,100 income she received in social security and two small pensions.
So when the 73-year-old Longmont, Colorado, resident attended a meeting on home sharing at her local senior center, she decided to give it a try.
“I was just barely making ends meet,” says the former bank receptionist who moved from Massachusetts in 2015 to be near her daughter and young grandchildren. “I had been a single parent of twin daughters, and I didn’t have much in retirement.”
Since January 2021, Miller has rented a bedroom to Marlene Mears, a retired teacher and Michigan transplant, for $650 a month.
Home sharing has gained popularity in recent years, especially among older adults like Miller.
The trend, more “Golden Girls” (a homeowner and housemate/mates) than “Friends” (just roommates, where no one has sole ownership over the space), is also popularly known as a “paying guest” arrangement in many parts of the world.
The arrangement’s popularity is fueled by rising rents and the increasing carrying costs of owning a home, such as mortgage debt, property taxes, maintenance cost and homeowner association dues.
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Between 2006 and 2016, the number of adults age 65 and older, who were sharing their homes with nonfamily members grew by 87%, from 470,000 to 879,000, according to the Joint Center for Housing Studies at Harvard University.
The high cost of rent – which has increased 17% since March 2021 – has hit seniors especially hard, says Amy Ford, vice president of strategic partnerships and business development at Silvernest, a Denver-based online platform which pairs homeowners with qualified roommates nationally.
“I think for most of our users who are entering into their retirement years, it was very difficult to have projected what the actual costs were going to be and determine how much they would’ve needed to save,” she says.
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Silvernest is among a growing number of companies connecting homeowners and potential renters.
The National Shared Housing Resource Center has a plethora of nonprofit organizations listed throughout the country. Home Share Oregon, one such nonprofit which matches people over the age of 18, is working with Oregon legislators on a bill to incentivize home sharing by giving homeowners who are willing to rent out a spare bedroom for $1,000 a month or less, a tax exemption on the additional income for longer term (three months or more) rental agreements.
What are the benefits of a homeshare?
For retirees, extra rooms are an opportunity to supplement income and offset cost-of-living increases while for home seekers – regardless of age – sharing a home can bolster the ability to save or in some cases, stave off homelessness, say experts. In many states, seniors are the fastest growing segment of the homeless population.
In 2021, 40.06 million households – or nearly one-third of all U.S. households – spent more than 30% of their income on housing, an increase of 3.4 million compared to 2019, according to an analysis of the American Community Survey data by Harvard University’s Joint Center for Housing Studies.
So why aren’t more people sharing their homes – and expenses?
“It’s not the cultural norm,” says Tess Fields, executive director of the nonprofit Home Share Oregon. “Prior to World War II, it was a ubiquitous practice. But now, while as a young person, you’re expected to have roommates, once you get married or partner up and buy a house, that cultural expectation does a complete 180 and is almost stigmatized.”
A home sharing arrangement is not just for retirees.
Fields, who has been a home sharer herself has had three tenants in their 20s – a college student who had lost her student housing during the pandemic and, more recently, two Ukrainian refugees in their early twenties.
What are the disadvantages of shared living?
Mear’s first experience with a homeowner in the Denver area, was less than ideal. She was matched by a nonprofit agency during the pandemic. But the only thing the pair had in common was their strict adherence of COVID protocols.
The homeowner, in her 70s, was overbearing and impossible to live with, says Mears. She also wouldn’t agree to any mediation by the agency that matched the pair.
“She acted as if I was her all around support person and would want me to sit and watch television with her all the time … and I just did not want to do that,” said Mears, who moved to the area after 30 years in Michigan.
Mears, a divorced mother of two grown children often just wanted some time to herself, she said.
“She’d get upset with me because I would go in my room and I would read,” said Mears. “If I was going to go get my driver’s license renewed, she’d say ‘Oh, I’ll come with you.’ I’m like, ‘No.’”
Mears has found the perfect housemate in Miller with whom she takes turns cooking. The two eat together in the home’s dining room. Mears has her own bathroom and a spot in the townhome’s two-car parking garage.
“It’s much cheaper than renting a one-bedroom,” says Mears. “I always keep in mind that this is Becky’s home and it’s her belongings, and she’s kind enough to share her belongings with me.”
She also travels often to visit her children and goes on trips and loves the independence of not having too many belongings.
“It’s the freedom and it’s the companionship. We’ve helped each other out a lot with medical visits and such,” she says. “When I was married, we were homeowners and I was just tired of thinking of this expense and that expense. … Being free from that responsibility was important.”
That was also the case with Alex Villagran, 83, who has had many housemate arrangements in the past 11 years and shares a cottage with Rosalie Gottfried, 86, in the Laguna Woods Village retirement community in Southern California.
Villagran pays $800 a month for his private room and bathroom and gets access to the community’s facilities including swimming pools, golf courses and theater. A one bedroom in Orange County, with a similar set up would run him close to $2,000, the housemates agree.
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“It’s a beautiful setup,” Villagran said. “I told her that it’s the most peaceful of all the rentals I’ve had through the years.”
For Gottfried, who had a career in real estate, the idea of home sharing was spurred by an accident two years ago, when she was trapped under a refrigerator (temporarily moved for repairs) which fell on her as she was getting water. Luckily, a friend happened to stop by an hour later and called paramedics.
She says her grown children (both doctors) did not want her to live by herself any longer. Meanwhile, the homeowner’s dues had more than doubled since she moved in 15 years ago, from $350 to $800 a month.
“The only way that some of us can handle it is to bring in additional income through rental,” she says, adding she wants to stay independent in her own home for as long as possible.
When it comes to choosing housemates, she sticks with men.
“I have determined as an older woman that I am more comfortable with a male housemate because women tend to get into each other spaces too much,” she says.
She did entertain a woman applicant early on in her house sharing journey.
“She came in with a lot of books, trying to convert me, to love Jesus. I am very clearly and firmly fixed in terms of how I feel about religion and the last thing in the world that I needed was somebody to come into my house and try to convert me,” says Gottfried, who describes herself as a secular humanistic Jew.
To screen potential housemates, Gottfried keeps a handy list that spells out requirements – like a weekly trip to the laundry – and prohibited behaviors, including smoking, drinking, drugs and overnight female guests.
She describes her living arrangement with Villagran as “a friendly, business-like relationship.”
“We say good morning when he comes in to make his coffee and I wish him a good day when he is walking out the door,” she says.
Home sharing is a great aid for those who want to age at home and stay independent for as long as possible, says Gottfried.
“There is a perception that once you get to be in your 80s,you know, you’re in diapers and eating baby food again,” says Gottfried. “But the reality is for those of us are still capable, we still use our brains, we still use our common sense and we still deal with ambition to whatever degree we can deal with it.”
Swapna Venugopal Ramaswamy is a housing and economy correspondent for USA TODAY. You can follow her on Twitter @SwapnaVenugopal and sign up for our Daily Money newsletter here.
