This week, the corporate that sells the ones bizarre chalky chocolates that most effective pop up round Valentine’s Day presented its new line-up of dialog hearts slogans, and y’all, they’re bleak.
In keeping with the announcement from Spangler Sweet, this 12 months’s Sweethearts Sweets are emblazoned with 16 other slogans, starting from the standard suspects like “BE MINE” to a sequence of “uplifting new sayings” for those occasions, together with “CHIN UP,” and “PUSH THRU.” If that weren’t miserable sufficient, the corporate could also be selling those new slogans with a Fb giveaway that encourages other people to “nominate any person who may use a spice up or has supported you over time — a trainer, instructor, mentor, sibling, or father or mother.” The prize? A unmarried field of Sweethearts Sweets, which may in reality be worse than receiving no prize in any respect.
Right here at Eater, we consider that we deserve higher from Sweethearts. If dialog hearts can’t style just right, a minimum of they are able to have messages which might be in reality related to the pandemic-era human situation. With out additional ado, right here’s an inventory of 16 slogans which might be decidedly extra suitable for those occasions, however simply as dispiriting as “PUSH THRU” or “FEAR LESS.”
- U VAXD?
- 1/1/21? WHERE WERE U?
- ON A SCALE OF N95, UR 100
- UGH, FINE
- MASK 4 MASK
- LET’S GO VIRAL
- WOULD SWAB 4 U
- DEWORM MY HEART
- U BOOST ME
- SHOW ME UR CHIN
- APOCALYPSE AND CHILL?
- I GUESS
- LET’S PUT OUR ANTI…BODIES TOGETHER
- ROSES ARE RED, I HAVE EXISTENTIAL DREAD
- UR LOVE IS CONTAGIOUS (NO REALLY, I TESTED POSITIVE)
- Simply the Xanax emblem
